Part One:
I step out my front door four days a week with my runners on, iPod on the go and a water bottle in my hand headed out to run where ever my feet take me. I go as far as want as fast or as slow as want, I turn off my brain and I center myself to the earth and to the music and I find peace.
Sometimes I get going and everything falls into place, I have hit what I call my 'rhythm'. For me that is when my heart rate, my breathing pattern and my legs all decide to work together and I feel like I am flying. I can't say at anytime I feel like it is effortless, but it sure feels good. I come home collapse in the driveway happy that I laced up my runners.
Other times I never hit IT. I don't get everything to match up, it feels like I am working harder than I have to; my shoulders are up high around my ears, I clench up my hands a bit. Or maybe its just a day that my legs feel heavy and I can feel my ass jiggling behind me as I pound my way down the hill. I does not feel good to run on these days, but when I get home and collapse in the driveway I feel good, happy that I laced up that day.
Part Two:
The kids have been back to school for almost a month now (APL they start back the Tuesday after Labour day, mine missed the first week, they were in Vegas with Paul) Sebass has started second grade and PJ is into first. Quentin had some choices to make this year, he could do one or two Kindergarten classes.
He is in the Montessori class and has been in the preschool for a few years now. He had the option of doing the Montessori kindergarten, the public school kindergarten or to do both classes on in the morning and one in the afternoon. Quentin thought about his options for about two seconds and said to me, "Mommy, I would like to make more friends so I think I will do both classes."
He does montessori in the morning and then a lunch program with the teachers of the morning class and then they walk him to his second classroom for the afternoon. (It is all at the same school and PJ and SeaBass are at the same school as well) What all this means is that all of my kids are in full time school.
I, being the fool that I am, have decided to most of my newly found free time to work. Yes, you read that right I volunteered to work more. I am now in the office 4 days a week. We have added office hours, we now have two days a week that between Paul and I we work straight through the day. We open the office and 7:00 and a.m. and we close at 5:00 no closing for lunch. It is working out well, but it means a bigger work load for all of us. Both Paul and I are feeling the crunch as we get into the rhythm of things.
Here is where I tie in Part One and Part Two:
I am struggling a bit to manage everything. I feel like I am sprinting from point A to point B all day every day. The kids have homework that needs to be attended too, they have piano lessons one afternoon a week (and practice their lessons 4 days a week, I only ask them to do it for 12 min. let's keep it reasonable, it is supposed to be fun.) they start Peter Puck on Thursday of this week and will do that only one day a week.
Learning how to get everything done and still keeping it fun for the kids has been like one one of those daily runs where I never quite get my rhythm. I feel like I am doing the right things and getting the right balance but I am struggling a bit to do it, shoulders up around my ears, my hands clenched to tight and my ass dragging along behind me while I completely forget to breath in and out. At the end of the day when I collapse on the couch I find myself glad I put on my runners and laced up but damn I can't wait until I find my rhythm again.
6 comments:
How cute that Q wanted to make more friends so chose both classes, that's great.
Sounds like once you get your groove back you'll be one happy woman. Your life's ambition is to be a great chiropractor and now you can do that more with the kids in school all day. It'll get better as routine sets in.
You'll get the hang of it. A lot of women are parents, work full time, take care of their families and all the little stuff that comes up.
I know there are a lot of families that have far more on their plates than we do and they seem to manage themselves just fine.
I was not complaining about my schedule, I was just sharing my thoughts about where I am at right now and how we are growing as a family.
I think my point was more about how growth can be uncomfortable, but our lives are usually richer for it.
Any kinds of big change does that to you. The trick is to find just a couple minutes for yourself. Just a few. That's why you don't have rhythm yet. Remember when I got home from work I demanded 15 minutes for myself before I started dealing with Mom stuff? That's why. Maybe your routine should include a quick shower after work and before dinner. That's just enough time to catch your breath and keep the rhythm.
Life is a dance. Play the music loud!
I know you weren't complaining. I was just trying to be supportive and let you know other people deal with the same stuff you do.
Finding balance when trying to juggle a job, family and chores can at times be overwhelming...those endorphins help but when you can't get in that run..shower moisturize and breathe now you are once again in charge and ready to take on the world or at least your part of it....keeep smiling that helps too...Sandi
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